How To Access Inner Wisdom Through Your Heart

Parenting through Your Heart Series (Part IV)

You already have an abundance of resources to assist you in parenting your children.  These resources are a part of you, they reside within you, and you can access them through your heart.

Your heart is a doorway, an opening, which you can use to receive guidance.

This guidance comes from your Divine Self.  Your Divine Self is that part of you who lives in the non-physical world and has a broader perspective of your life and who you are.  It sees your current challenges and the possible paths ahead of you, and knows which ones can bring you the most joy. 

Your Divine Self loves you unconditionally and wants you to be happy.  It is constantly offering you guidance to help you.  The most common channel of communication that your Divine Self uses to offer its guidance is your feelings.

Your Divine Self uses negative emotions to let you know that what you are focusing on or thinking about at that moment is not in harmony with what you want or with your inner wisdom.  Your negative feeling (i.e., frustration, anger, guilt, sadness, disappointment, etc.) is a signal from your Divine Self to redirect your thoughts to something that makes you feel better (i.e., relief, excitement, acceptance, joy, peace, love, etc).

Your Divine Self knows that you attract what you focus on.  It knows how the Law of Attraction works and how powerful it is.  (For more info on the Law of Attraction, read the article “The Law of Attraction and Parenting” in this website.)

So when you feel upset because your child said “No!” to you, your inner guidance is warning you that you are focusing on the resistance coming from your child.  This resistance is not what you want.  You want harmony, cooperation, and understanding between you and your child.

If you focus on the resistance, you will attract more resistance.  This resistance may easily evolve into a full fledged power struggle.  Has this happened to you before?

When you recognize your Divine Self’s message through your negative feelings, you can then change your focus from the resistance to something like, “My child is saying ‘No’ because she desires something different than what I suggested.  I wonder what she wants.  I wonder if there is a need she is trying to meet.  This can be an opportunity for us to work together and meet both of our wants and needs; an opportunity for us to understand and help each other.”

How do these thoughts feel to you?  Do they feel better?  When you feel positive emotion, it means your Divine Self is letting you now that your thoughts are in harmony with what you desire and your highest good.

Your positive feelings let you know that at that moment, you are attracting more of what you want into your life.  In this case, you will then be in a space where a solution that makes both you and your child feel good is easier to find.

Exercise 1: Receiving guidance through your feelings. 

Let’s take a moment to receive guidance from your Divine Self through your feelings.  Think about a decision you need to make.  This decision can be related to yourself, your child, or a loved one.  Ready?  Now, do you have one, two, or more possible solutions to choose from?

Imagine yourself choosing option #1.  Imagine yourself taking the action that this option requires.  How do you feel?  Once you get a feeling associated with this option, move on to the next step.

Imagine yourself choosing option #2.  How does taking this action make you feel? 

Now, ask your Divine Self if there is another option that you don’t know about yet.  How do you feel?  Do you get a sense that there is another option?  If there is, how does it feel to wait until that option becomes clearer?

Which option feels best to you?  The option that makes you feel the most positive feelings (or the least negative ones) is the one your Divine Self, your inner wisdom, is guiding you to take.

I recently used this exercise to help me decide when was best for my boys and I to visit my mom in Florida.  I had a couple of options, each one with its pros and cons:

Option #1:  Visit my mom during February ’08 school vacation.

Option #2:  Visit my mom during December ’07 school vacation.

I first imagined going to Florida in February (option #1).  I felt good, but I also felt a tightness on my chest.  Even though I didn’t have a word to describe my physical sensation, I made a mental note of this feeling.

I then, imagined us going to Florida in December.  The tightness on my chest disappeared and I felt excitement.  I checked within for any other feelings and noticed that I was also feeling somewhat apprehensive.   This option would not allow me to be home for Christmas, which is important to me.

I wondered if there was another option.  I decided to sleep on it and see if another better feeling option appeared.  I trusted that I would get a clear sign (feeling) to guide me.

That week, my husband asked me, “Why don’t you go visit your mom in December, take an extra week off from school and be back here by Christmas day?”  I immediately felt a sense of excitement, anticipation and relief.  “That’s it!”  Even though, this option involved extra work on my part and my boys missing school, I knew that was the best option for us!

Your feelings are of great value to you.  Paying attention to how you feel as you go through your day offers you clarity and guidance.

Exercise 2:  Inspired Writing

Another way you can access your inner wisdom is by inviting your Divine Self to speak to you.  Your Divine Self will then use a combination of words, images and feelings to communicate with you.  You can write these impressions down on a piece of paper.  (You can get paper and pen now if you wish to do the exercise at this moment).

To connect with your Divine Self in this way, it is helpful to first open your heart, the doorway to your inner wisdom.

Start by placing your awareness on the area of your heart.  Take a few deep breaths and imagine the air you are breathing in is going to your heart.  Imagine your heart space is opening, allowing for more love and wisdom to come through.  You may even see or sense light around it.

Think of a few things you feel grateful for.  Feeling gratitude and appreciation is a great way to open the heart!

Now, call and greet your Divine Self.  On top of the paper, write,

“Dear Divine Self, thank you for your love, guidance and support.  I thank you for the guidance that you are about to share with me.  I intend to receive your message clearly and accurately.  I invite messages that are uplifting and for the highest good of all involved.”  

Then, write your question.

Listen, see, feel… the answer flowing to you.  Pay attention to anything you get and write down your answer.  Trust that in whatever form it comes to you is perfect at this moment.  You may also receive more details and clarification at a later time.

~ ~ ~ ~

Access the wisdom within your heart often.  Listen to your feelings.  Trust the inner messages you receive. 

When you invite your heart to guide your thoughts, words and actions, miracles happen!  Your life becomes easier and more joyous.  You feel better and everyone around you benefits.

You have within you all that you need to parent your beautiful children in a confident and joyous way!

By Dumari Dancoes

(c) Children Lights  2007

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